Lose Weight the Healthy Way - Use your Head!

How many times have you tried to diet and managed successfully for a few days or even weeks - and then found that your eating has spun out of control and you have piled all the weight on again? Does your weight fluctuate like a yo-yo? Have you tried every diet in the book and spent a fortune, only to find yourself back at square one (or worse) every time?

This is a problem shared by many people. Society tells us that we are not attractive or lovable unless our bodies are 'perfect'. Poor self-esteem causes us to desperately struggle to achieve that 'model figure'.

The major ingredient missing from most diets is an understanding of how our bodies 'think' and the role that food and eating (or overeating!) play in our emotional functioning. Without this knowledge, you can diet, starve, fast, exercise all you like - and even lose weight drastically, but you will be almost guaranteed to put it all on again - and then some!

But before we take a look at how our bodies 'think', let's first explore the mechanics of weight loss.

How does weight loss or gain take place?

Food is taken into our bodies, converted into growth, heat and energy and then excreted. This process is called metabolism. Some people have faster metabolic rates than others do. Individuals can also increase their own metabolism by increasing activity levels (e.g. exercising). We put on weight when the intake of food exceeds our energy and growth needs and the body then "stores" the excess as fat, "in case" it is needed later. Weight loss takes place when the energy requirements of the body exceed the intake of food. Those same "reserves" are then used to make up the difference and weight loss takes place. If there is a perfect balance (on average) between the body's needs and its intake, body weight will remain stable.

Most weight loss programs work by reducing the intake of food and/or increasing activity levels in order to 'burn up' fat.

What happens when we drastically reduce our food intake in order to lose weight? How do our bodies interpret a crash diet?

Our bodies think, “Famine!!!”

Crash diets make you fat!

When we diet or drastically reduce our intake of food, our bodies "think" that we are starving because there is a famine or lack of food available. The body then goes into crisis mode and slows down metabolism in order to conserve or make the most of the little food it is getting. The longer the 'famine' lasts, the slower your metabolism will become. Sooner or later (because we are depriving our bodies of essential nutrients) we will be forced to 'binge' or break our diet. When this happens, the body 'hangs on' to every bit of fat, carbohydrate or 'storable' food taken in, because:

a) metabolism is still slow and

b) the body will want to lay in 'provisions' for any future famine by storing food 'just in case'.

The more we crash diet, the more our bodies become convinced that our food supplies are unreliable and the more they will therefore tend to store fat.

If this happens often enough, we will begin to put on weight even while eating a normal, healthy diet.

So what is the answer?

The answer, believe it or not, is to eat more! This will 'trick' our body into increasing metabolic rate to deal with the excess supply of food. The secret is in WHAT you eat and HOW OFTEN you eat, not in reducing the amount you eat! Obviously if you begin eating large amounts of rich foods and chocolates you are not going to do anything except put on weight (sorry!:-) However, frequent meals consisting of fruit, raw vegetables, rye or whole wheat biscuits, low fat cheese, yogurt, grains, etc., accompanied by a daily increase in energy levels (exercise) will help you to increase your metabolism and lose weight without subsequent 'bingeing' or tendency to put on weight after the diet.

When we exercise, our bodies need more energy.

Food and any reserves (i.e. fat deposits) are then metabolized more quickly in order to produce that energy. When we exercise more regularly, our bodies get the message that metabolism needs to stay higher because energy levels require it. We will then tend to 'burn' our food intake faster, whether we are exercising or not. People who rarely exercise usually have slow metabolic rates, because their bodies 'know' that they do not need much energy to get through the day.

Exercise also builds lean muscle, which adds to metabolic rate and helps us to lose weight faster.

Beware of the messages you are sending your body!

Don’t starve yourself – you will only put the weight on again and again and again!

Comfort eating is another common problem.

This can sometimes be due to boredom and inactivity, but is often linked to depression and low self-esteem. Go to www.feelgoodcounseling.com/eating_disordersBKS.htm and take a look at the recommended books dealing with the link between emotional health and eating. Consumption of rich food is thought to temporarily increase serotonin levels and lift mood in a manner very similar to anti-depressants. While eating these foods, we feel 'full' and satisfied, but soon after we begin to experience feelings of guilt and despondency.

The Native Remedies Weight Loss Diet is a healthy eating plan, which helps the mind, body and the emotions to work together to achieve permanent weight loss.

It is specifically designed to increase metabolism and to prevent the 'bingeing' effect so often experienced with many other diets. You will not loose ridiculous amounts of weight in "just three weeks/eight days", etc. But - if you follow the plan and keep eating (!!), you will steadily lose weight without stressing yourself and your body. And the weight will stay off!

It is important that you enjoy your food and that your senses are stimulated and aroused when you eat. It is also important that you have enough to eat (see 'Famine' above!) so that your body does not start to 'hoard' the food that you consume. You need a variety of different foods for your health and to prevent boredom, causing you to binge or crave fattening foods. The Native Remedies Weight Loss Program provides foods of different textures, colors, flavors and aromas to stimulate all your senses!

In order to achieve maximum effectiveness, the Native Remedies Weight Loss Program should be coupled with regular exercise - at least three one-hour sessions a week, preferably more. You can decide on what kind of exercise you prefer and anything goes - just so long as you increase your heart rate and work up a bit of a sweat! So walk, dance, run, garden, join an aerobics or kick boxing class - whatever works for you! But keep it regular and that excess weight will begin to melt off your body! You will find that the regular exercise will lift your mood and increase self-esteem too - making it more likely that you will stick to your Healthy Eating Program!

Here goes!

The Native Remedies Weight Loss Plan is a flexible diet that lists the basic ingredients available to you for each meal. The more variety you can achieve in the preparation of the food, the better. Remember that boredom is a big factor in the failure of many weight loss programs!

When you wake up:

Start your day each day with a cup of boiled water with a slice of fresh lemon in it. Lemon helps with the production of bile - which breaks down fat in the food supply. Put the lemon in the cup and pour the boiling water over it. Leave to cool and draw for about three minutes and sip slowly.

Breakfast:

This is an important meal! Wake up your metabolism and use the following foods to prepare your breakfast.

One cup of high fiber plain cereal or oats (no sugar or flavoring like chocolate! No muesli!)

Use fruit juice or skim milk with the cereal.

Whole apple cut into slices or wedges or a grapefruit.

Cup of herbal tea or juice. (fennel tea is very good for weight loss and will also help to settle the stomach)

Note: One slice of whole-wheat or rye bread/toast with low fat cottage cheese (or a hard boiled egg) can be substituted for the cereal three times a week. Don't leave out the apple or the herbal tea!

Midmorning:

Cup of herbal tea
2 small whole wheat or rye crackers (you can use a 0% fat spread like vegemite on them)
1 apple cut into wedges or slices

Main Meal:

You should preferably have your main meal at midday, not at night. This gives your body a chance to digest it and to use up the calories instead of storing them. If this is impossible, make sure that you eat at least three hours before going to bed.

Use the following foods in a variety of ways to prepare your food. For example you may grill, steam or bake (not fry) the fish/meat/chicken whole or you may cut it into small pieces and stir-fry it in a low-fat oil with the vegetables or the pasta.

· One medium portion of fish/chicken or lean meat (red meat not more than twice a week)

· One small portion of starch (brown rice, pasta, potatoes – boiled, steamed or baked)

(avoid lamb or mutton and remove the skin from chicken before cooking)

One big portion of raw salad containing

· a green leaf vegetable (lettuce/cabbage/spinach),

· an orange vegetable or fruit (orange/carrot/tangerine),

· a green vegetable or fruit (cucumber, green pepper/celery/parsley)

· a red vegetable or fruit (red pepper, tomato) and

· a white vegetable or fruit (apple, pear, cucumber). Add sprouts like lentil, alfalfa, barley or a few sunflower seeds if you like.

You can substitute the salad three times a week with cooked vegetables from the above groups so long as they are steamed, baked or lightly boiled - or cooked in lemon juice or plain yogurt. Try and include all the colors - green, red, orange, yellow and white!

If you are a vegetarian, you can increase the salad and add almonds, low fat cottage cheese and sunflower seeds or use soybeans, tofu, egg or other protein source.

Mid-afternoon snack

Same as for the mid-morning snack. These snacks are important - don't skip them!

Second meal (lunch or supper):

1 red apple

1 green apple

1 banana

1 orange

1 other fruit, e.g. strawberry, melon, peach, pear, etc)

1-cup plain low fat yogurt

1 glass fruit juice/herbal tea.

Either combine the above into a fruit salad and use the yogurt as a dressing or cut the fruit up into attractive wedges/slices and arrange on your plate. You can then eat the yogurt separately.

Before bed:

Cup of Chamomile tea (good for the stomach and also soothing and relaxing) or a cup of warm low fat milk;

One banana or one sweet plain biscuit

(this snack will also help you to sleep)

NOTES:

• Remember to take your Ecoslim Slimming Drops three times a day. This will help to control appetite and also provide energy for exercise.
• Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day - non-negotiable! Begin each meal with a glass of water.
• No sugar allowed! Use artificial sweeteners if you absolutely must - but rather try to become accustomed to going without sugar. This eating plan provides lots of natural sugars.
• Good herbal teas to drink are mint tea, Chinese green tea, fennel tea or chamomile (sleepy tea) - all good for digestion!
• You can cook or flavor with lemon juice, herbs, garlic or ginger to your heart's content. You can also use Oriental spices like tumeric, chilli, masala, etc - but no MSG! Moderate amounts of salt are OK, but don't overdo it!
• Try to have your main meal at midday, so that you have a chance to digest it.
• If you are tempted to deviate from the eating plan, get up and DO something! Go for a walk, visit a friend, write an email, put on some music and dance – do anything! But, most importantly, get away from the food that is tempting you!
• No calorie-counting, food weighing or worrying please! 'Big' means large, 'medium' means a little smaller than your norm and 'small' means just a little. Don't fuss - it stresses you out and makes you head for the chocolate!
• It is a good idea to keep a daily record of your meals - it helps to commit yourself and to be able to identify where things go wrong.
• Try your best not to 'cheat' or 'lapse', but if you do - don't despair! Don't give up in misery and guilt. Accept that you are human, give yourself a 'pep talk' and start afresh!
• In addition to the meals in the Eating Plan, the following foods are 'free' and can be eaten as much as you like: apple, raw carrot, celery sticks, raw mushrooms, cucumber.

Above all, keep listening to your body!

Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 12:56 PM | Permalink

Panic Attacks, Anxiety Disorders and Teenagers and Adults - Social Anxiety Disorder and School

Help Yourself to Overcome Panic Attacks

Many people who suffer from panic attacks would be surprised to hear that this is a relatively common condition. Some people experience panic, or anxiety attacks once or twice during times of stress, while others have a full blown Panic Disorder, experiencing panic attacks a few times a week, or even on a daily basis. A Panic Disorder will be diagnosed if there are at least three panic attacks within a three-week period in reaction to situations that are not life threatening and which are not associated with physical exertion.

Panic attacks can occur at any time of the day or night and are so disturbing that many people have been rushed to emergency medical centers with suspected heart attacks or seizures, only to be told "It's only a panic attack".

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ONLY a panic attack! Most people who have suffered a full-blown attack would have difficulty accepting this phrase. There is nothing 'only' about a panic attack, which can be so terrifying that the person is convinced that she is about to die on the spot! To be told that you are 'only' having a panic attack does not make it less real or less frightening - but often leaves the person feeling foolish and misunderstood, convinced that there is some undiagnosed medical problem which the doctors have missed.

Unfortunately, it has been my experience that many medical doctors have not been sufficiently trained in how to help people suffering from panic attacks. The usual medical treatment involves reassuring the patient that she is 'fine' and prescribing medication, which is often addictive and which may come with side effects that are sometimes more debilitating than the panic attacks themselves.

If more doctors recognized that panic attacks are relatively easy to treat without prescription medication, patients would be referred for treatment at the early stages of the problem. This would mean that there would be fewer people with chronic and severe forms of panic disorder and fewer dependent on strong drug therapy.

This eBooklet will examine the nature of panic attacks so that you can understand exactly what is happening to your body during an attack. With this knowledge, you can learn to identify the early stages of an attack and use certain techniques to minimize the attack or even completely prevent it from occurring.

What are Panic Attacks?

A panic attack is a physiological response to fear or sudden anxiety. Sometimes the object of fear is physical (like a spider) or an event (fear of flying, fear of heart attack or dying). Other times the panic attack occurs without an apparent trigger and may just 'happen'.

The symptoms of a panic attack include the following: shortness of breath or feelings of suffocation; vertigo or faintness; heart palpitations; chest pains; trembling; sweating; chills or flushes; nausea; tingling sensations in hands, feet and face; feelings of de-personalization or de-realization; fear of dying, collapse or 'going crazy'; an uncontrollable desire to run away or escape.

If you look closely at these symptoms, you will agree that they very closely resemble the body's reaction to a frightening or life-threatening event. The experience of a panic attack is no different in symptoms or intensity to the experience of being threatened with a knife in a dark and lonely alley, or coming face to face with a dangerous wild animal! There is the same feeling of intense fear, the same rush of adrenaline and the same overwhelming need to escape. The only difference is that there is no actual danger present, or the perceived danger is one that would not unduly worry the majority of people.

In essence, then, a panic attack occurs when the brain 'misinterprets' a situation or event as life threatening and sets into motion a series of physiological and chemical events which result in what we call a 'flight or fight' response. Your body is made ready to either run away or to fight to the death! There is a surge of adrenaline, which provides the energy (and the desire!) to fight or to run away. Then there is an increase in the heart rate and the person begins to breathe faster and with shallower breaths, trying to get more oxygen to flow into the lungs. If there was really physical danger present, the individual would use up all the adrenaline in fighting off her foe and that would be that! During a panic attack, however, there is no actual need to fight or run away, so the rapid breathing often becomes hyperventilation. Hyperventilation upsets the levels of carbon dioxide and oxygen in the body, causing dizziness, tingling sensations, shortness of breath, chest pains, feelings of suffocation and fear of collapse or dying. All of these sensations, in turn, further frighten the person who is experiencing the attack - leading to more severe symptoms, thereby significantly prolonging the attack and increasing the severity of symptoms.

How to control a Panic Attack

Now that you understand that a panic attack is a series of physiological and chemical responses caused when the brain 'misinterprets' a situation as life threatening, you can use this knowledge to achieve control over your panic attack so that you can either minimize it significantly, or even completely prevent it, without the use of strong drugs.

The first thing to tell yourself is that a panic attack cannot kill you. Nobody has ever died of a panic attack and you are not going to be the first one in history! While panic attacks FEEL life threatening, they are not at all dangerous. Other people may not even notice that you are having a panic attack, unless you tell them. Panic attacks feel MUCH worse than they look!

Secondly, your body cannot sustain a panic attack for long. Even if you do nothing at all, your body will adjust itself to balance oxygen and carbon dioxide levels and remove excess adrenaline from the blood stream within at most 10 - 15 minutes, but usually only a few minutes. So what you are facing is not a life threatening illness, but only a brief 'episode' of panic. Many of my clients have been significantly helped by this knowledge and find that it really makes a difference to tell themselves that "This will only last a few minutes and then it will be gone".

Thirdly (and here's where YOU can be in control!) there are two main things to work on when preventing or minimizing a panic attack. The first is preventing hyperventilation syndrome (see above). The second is preventing a build up of adrenaline. Of the two, preventing hyperventilation syndrome is by far the most important - and so easy to do that it almost seems too simple!

To prevent hyperventilation syndrome, all you have to do, at the first sign of anxiety, is to slow your breathing down to about 10 deep breaths per minute. Breathe slowly and deeply in through your nose (try to breathe from your diaphragm rather than from your chest), hold your breath in for a few seconds and then release your breath slowly from your mouth. While you are breathing out slowly, it helps a lot to silently say (think) something calming like 'relax'. Your diaphragm is a big sheet of muscle just under your lungs at the bottom of your rib cage. To achieve breathing with your diaphragm, you must push your diaphragm down towards your navel, so that your stomach 'balloons' out, while at the same time allowing air to enter your lungs naturally. When you relax your diaphragm, it will return to its usual position and thereby expel the air slowly from your lungs. It is worthwhile practicing this technique while you are alone and relaxed, but if you find you struggle too much - don't worry! Slow, even and deep breathing will do the trick just as well. It is more important that you relax, than worrying about technique!

Once you have controlled your breathing and are more relaxed, you may find it useful to walk around a little, thereby using up some of the adrenaline in your body.

Sometimes a panic attack can creep up unexpectedly and before you know it you have all the full-blown symptoms, without even having a chance to practice your breathing. You may even wake up at night in the middle of an attack. Don't worry! Even right in the middle of a panic attack, you can begin to control your breathing - slow breath in through your nose, hold your breath for a few seconds - and then slowly release the air through your mouth, thinking 'relax' and even consciously allowing your muscles to release tension and loosen up. The first few breaths may be a little difficult, but you will soon get the hang of the slow rhythmic breathing. Remind yourself that the panic attack will only last a few minutes and that it cannot harm you. Continue the slow breathing and before long you will be feeling much better!

Learning to control the symptoms of a panic attack improves with practice. Most people find that the breathing technique alone helps almost immediately, but some people need to keep trying until it works properly. It is advisable to find about 10 - 15 minutes once or twice a day to sit comfortably in a quiet spot and practice deep, slow breathing, not forgetting to think the word 'relax' every time you breathe out and making sure that you relax all your muscles as you breathe in and out. If you do this regularly, you will not only decrease the incidence of panic attacks, but you will also increase your ability to control the panic attacks if they do occur. Many of my clients find that once they have learned to control their panic attacks, the attacks disappear altogether!

Is there anything else I can do?

There are many other things one can do to decrease the incidence of panic attacks.

The first thing to remember is that the healthier your lifestyle, the less you will suffer from panic attacks. Regular exercise is a big help - as is a balanced healthy diet and regular meals. Make sure that you get sufficient sleep - studies have shown that sleep deprivation increases the incidence of panic attacks. Avoid stimulants like alcohol, drugs, caffeine and foods high in sugar. If you suffer from anxiety and stress, try and find out the causes and take steps to address them. If you are not sure why you are experiencing anxiety, consult a professional. You will find another useful eBooklet dealing specifically with Understanding and Treating Anxiety at

Understanding and Treating Anxiety

Many therapists use techniques like progressive relaxation or meditation to help the client learn how to access his own calming response (everybody has one!) and to lower anxiety levels to more comfortable states. This is often combined with psychotherapy to help improve self-esteem and understand the causes of the anxiety and cognitive therapy to 'reprogram' the negative thoughts underlying the anxiety or panic.

There are also many natural products which help and may be used alone or in combination with therapy. Regular use of MindSoothe (a combination St John's Wort/Passiflora capsule) can minimize anxiety and stress and improve overall mood, thereby reducing the incidence and severity of panic attacks.

Try and involve yourself in something enjoyable and fulfilling. If you are a very active person socially and career-wise, take up something relaxing like yoga or pottery. If you are withdrawn and inactive, join a club, offer your services as a volunteer, or take up a hobby or sport which would bring you into contact with people. Taking your mind off your problems is often a big help! If you tend to take on too much, learn to ask for help!

Finally, it is important to note that most anxiety and panic disorders respond well to treatment and I would encourage anyone who suffers from these disorders to go for help. It can make all the difference to your life!

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Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 12:47 PM | Permalink

Realize that this is an Adjustment Period

When you are feeling hurt, angry and confused, it is very difficult to see that this is 'just' an adjustment period and that it will get better. Your heart is broken. You may be feeling betrayed and angry. Your whole world has been turned upside down and you cannot imagine that your life will ever be worthwhile again. You may even feel so bad that you think about committing suicide.

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Many of my clients have told me that one of the most helpful things that I did for them was to help them to realize that they were going through an adjustment phase and that they would not feel that way forever. Although it may be difficult to accept at the time, tell yourself that you are now feeling at your worst and that you will begin to feel progressively better as the days go by. The more you do to help yourself adjust, the quicker the adjustment period will be.

Remember that you have lost many things in the process of divorce. You will have lost your partner and the dreams that you had of growing older together. You may have lost your home or the standard of living that you were accustomed to. Perhaps you have lost friends and family members who are now 'ex' family members. You have probably lost your trust and your self-esteem. You have to allow yourself a period of time to mourn these losses. Just as people mourn loved ones who have died, so you have to mourn all the things that you have lost in the process of divorce. Tell yourself that you may be in mourning and that you will have to help yourself get through this - but that the time will come when your mourning period is finished and you can celebrate a new beginning. Be kind to yourself!

How long will this 'adjustment' take? Well, people vary, depending on many factors. Even if it is a relatively 'straightforward' divorce, allow yourself at least a year before you expect to start feeling 'yourself' again. This is not to say that you will feel awful for a year and then wake up one day feeling great. At first it may be very hard. Then you will begin to have a good day here and there. These good days will become more frequent until there is only an occasional bad day. One day you will realize that you haven't thought of your ex for a whole week! Believe me - this WILL happen! Give yourself time and don't expect to 'bounce back' straight away.

Make use of your social support!

You may feel so bad that you want to curl up in a corner and die! The last thing that you may want to do is to be in the company of others. Remember what I said above? This is an adjustment phase - not the way it is going to be forever! Don't withdraw and push people away. Spend time with friends and family. Join a social club or join a group or sport of some sort (hiking, walking, chess, dancing, charity, church, tennis, etc). Take up a hobby or craft and allow yourself to meet new people and learn new things. It will take your mind off your worries and help to boost your self-esteem.

Join a divorce support group or go for counseling

Think about joining a divorce support group in your area. It will help tremendously to talk to people who are going through the same experience as you are. If you can talk to a support group, you will be able to unburden yourself there and find support and encouragement that you may not always find from others.

Think about going for professional counseling, especially if you are feeling very vulnerable. If you are experiencing symptoms of depression, it is very important to go and speak to a counselor who will help you to work through your pain and monitor your symptoms to make sure that they do not get worse. Some of the symptoms of depression are sleep and appetite disturbance, excessive tearfulness, irritability, inability to concentrate, fatigue and loss of interest in usually pleasurable activities. These may just be temporary and part of your adjustment period or they may be more serious.

Don't get involved again too quickly!

This may seem like a cliché - but many people get involved in new relationships 'on the rebound'. This is a time of your life when you are very vulnerable and lonely and are carrying a lot of baggage. Make friends, have fun - but try to keep it light and friendly! Although there have been some very strong relationships forged just after a divorce, the odds are against it and the last thing you will be able to cope with now is another hurt. Be careful and work through your experience before you move on to another serious relationship. People who move from one broken relationship to the other in serial fashion often become prone to depression and insecurity and never stay single for long enough to find out who they really are. The longer you have been part of a couple, the longer you need to 'find' yourself again.

Use natural alternatives to prescription drugs

It is my experience that doctors tend to prescribe medication too quickly when people are distressed and this could lead to problems that you don't need, like addiction. Prescription sleeping medication is usually habit forming and could cause you to lose your ability to fall asleep on your own. Some anti-depressants or anxiolytics 'numb' your feelings and this means that you do not have the opportunity to work through them when it is most appropriate. People who have been prescribed strong medication after a trauma like divorce or loss of a loved one, often experience problems later on and these may be worse because they are often triggered by a similar event. Work through your feelings now - and if you ever have another difficult thing to cope with in the future, you will be stronger and better equipped to do so.

This is not to say that must not use anything to help you cope. There are many natural remedies for sleep, anxiety, and depression that are not habit forming and which do not have the same sort of side effects to prescription medicines. While there is a place for stronger medication, this should be the last resort. Many doctors do not have the time or the counseling skills to work with people who are going through emotional turmoil and giving them tablets is too often the easy way out. A warm bath with aromatherapy oils, lavender oil on your pillow and a cup of chamomile tea before bedtime will often relax you sufficiently to put you to sleep. Regular exercise helps to fight depression and build self-esteem. MindSoothe is an all herbal natural remedy to treat depression and anxiety and help you to get through a difficult time. For more information on natural remedies, go to MindSoothe - Depression and Anxiety Treatment

Talk About It

This is the most effective way of relieving depression and anxiety. Share your problems and "externalize" them, rather than bottling them up. You will be amazed at how relieved you feel and how you are able to begin to get things into perspective.

Do Nice Things For Yourself

Nurture and spoil yourself. You deserve it too! So have a bubble bath, buy that special something you've been wanting, play your favorite music and SING, have an aromatherapy massage or put a few drops of lavender oil in your bath, go on holiday - and do it because YOU ARE SPECIAL!

Feeling sad and lonely often leads to self-neglect, which makes you feel and look even worse. This is not the time to stay in your pj's all day! Make the effort to pay attention to personal hygiene and grooming, dress smartly, and look after yourself. Treat yourself to a new hairdo and some new clothes and you will be amazed at the difference it will make! Boost your self-esteem! You need it!

Eat Well

Are you used to 'cooking for two'? Does it seem pointless to sit down to a meal on your own? Nonsense! You are important too and there is no reason why you should not sit down and enjoy a meal. If you have been cooking for others for years, aren't you worth cooking for too? You are going through a difficult time and need to eat properly. When you are under stress, your body needs more nutrition to help boost the immune system which is depleted by your stress levels. If you do not eat properly and look after yourself, you will become ill and you do not need that!

Some foods can help to fight depression and anxiety. A carbohydrate rich diet (especially 'whole' carbohydrates) helps the body produce serotonin - the 'feelgood' chemical. Special serotonin foods are oats, whole wheat, bananas and other carbohydrate rich foods. Make sure you are having a full complement of Vitamin B, magnesium and iron - a deficiency in any of these can lead to depression and anxiety-type symptoms and insomnia

Learn to Relax or Meditate

Relaxation techniques and meditation are easy to learn and are so effective in relieving stress, anxiety and depression that I wonder why they are not routinely prescribed or even taught as a life skill at school!

Don't make any unnecessary changes yet

It is sometimes tempting to make major changes in order to take one's mind off the difficult feelings. Some people decide to change jobs, start courses of study or sell their homes. While there is no hard and fast rule, remember that any change will require adjustment and lots of effort and you probably have enough on your plate at the moment. The potential to make bad decisions is also high when you are going through a stressful time. Remember that it takes at least a year to adjust to a major change like divorce. If you can leave big decisions and changes till a later stage it is probably worthwhile doing that.

What about the children?

If you have children, remember that they are going through a difficult time too. Make sure that they understand what is going on and what the arrangements about visitation are. Try not to allow your feelings towards your ex to influence them. They are not divorcing their parent and it will be beneficial to their development to maintain a good relationship with him or her. Do not run down your ex or fight in front of the children and try to make time to discuss the rules of visitation and communication as well as other matters like money. Do this separately from the children if possible.

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	PureCalm - Immediate Anxiety Attack Relief Non-addictive, immediate relief from symptoms of anxiety, stress, irritability, nervous tension, restlessness, panic attacks without side effects of prescription drugs. $29.95 + S/H

Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 12:45 PM | Permalink

CANDIDA ALBICANS

Candida is a type of fungus (also called yeast), and is only one of a huge number of micro-organisms that exist in a human body. Normally, in a healthy body, Candida does not cause any problem. However, when the bio-balance is upset by factors such as unhealthy lifestyle, stress, excessive consumption of sugar and refined carbohydrate, chronic use of medications such as anti-biotics, cortisone, the pill, etc, then one finds an overgrowth of Candida in the body.

This can result in toxins being released into the bloodstream and can have many adverse effects on the functioning of the body. The immune system is unable to cope with the continuous release of toxins into the body, leading to dis-ease. Symptoms can include depression, mood swings, sinusitis, headaches, chronic fatigue, joint pain, stomach pain, indigestion, vaginal thrush and other fungal infections, skin rashes and eczema, etc.

Fortunately, Candida can be controlled by means of a balanced diet and by the elimination of certain foods in order to create an internal environment in which the yeast cannot survive. An initial detox diet will ensure, along with our Candidate formula will ensure that the levels of systemic Candida are significantly reduced. Thereafter, a maintenance program should be followed to keep Candida permanently at bay. Remember that Candida thrives on all sugars and refined carbohydrates and it is only by controlling your intake of these foods that you will beat systemic Candida. By following this diet, you will not only be able to control Candida levels in your body, but you will also be amazed at the amount of energy you have. Your skin will clear, your eyes will sparkle and you will even lose weight, despite the fact that you need never go hungry! Many people find that the Candida diet helps to clear joint and back pain, balance sugar levels and blood pressure, control cholesterol and relieve symptoms of depression – all without medication! This is because by reducing Candida overgrowth in the body, the immune system is able to function properly for the first time in years, allowing the body to heal itself!

Some Important Points

When following the Candida diet, you must make sure that your blood sugar levels are kept at an acceptable level by eating a substantial breakfast, lunch and supper. If you find that your energy level is low or you are experiencing dizziness while on the diet, it is probably due to low blood sugar. If this happens, simply add a mid-morning and mid afternoon snack. Please remember to drink lots of water in order to assist the elimination of toxins from your body. After a few days of detoxing, some of your symptoms may become worse and you could also experience headaches. This is quite normal and part of the detoxification process. It will improve after a few days and you will begin to feel healthier than you have felt for years! The Candida diet should be followed for 4 weeks, followed by a maintenance program as outlined.

You may not use sugar in any form – this includes sucrose (cane sugar), gluscose and fructose (fruit sugar). Lactose (milk sugar) to be kept to a minimum.

CANDIDA DIET

Foods Allowed

• Rye Vita (contains no yeast) Chicken, fish, meat (preferably-
• Rye Bread (no yeast or wheat) roasted/grilled or steamed)
• Rice cakes Sunflower/olive oil
• Rice, potato or rye flour 30ml lemon juice
• Corn or soya flour all veggies fresh or frozen – no tinned food
• Oats, maize (corn) meal, maltabella Avocado pears
• Dairy-milk 125ml per day Sweet / normal potatoes
• Plain Bulgarian yoghurt-125ml (no sugar!) Brown rice (no white rice)
• Low fat cottage cheese (no sugar!) Onions / garlic (unless sensitive)
• Soya / Rice milk Walnuts, cashews, hazel,
• Ricotta cheese pecan, coconut & macadamia
• Popcorn (homemade), plain chips (no MSG
• One fruit per day (no melons & Herbal teas eg Rooibos
• grapes) Make sure that fruit is not bruised. Lipton herbal teas
• Herbs Mineral water
• Tomatoes Artificial sweeteners eg. Advantage
• Humus

Foods allowed weekly (only one item of each)

• Wholewheat pasta 1 rice cake with carob or yogurt topping
• Wheatbix (sugar free), tomato paste
• (if no wheat allergy is prevalent)
• Soft goat cheeses e.g. Camembert, feta or goat

Foods allowed twice a week (only one item of each)

• Tinned tuna or Salmon in spring water Spices eg. curries, chillies (avoid if allergic)
• Foods to Avoid
• Anything containing yeast Pickled, smoked or processed meat,
• fish (including cold meats, & vacuum packed foods)
• Breads, marmite provita, Bovril etc
• White wheat flour or pastry flour,
• Gluten flour, flake cereals, semolina,
• Cream of wheat, pasta – white All vinegars and vinegar products (chutney,
• mayonnaise, salad dressing etc)
• Cheese, fermented or processed
• eg. Cheddars, feta from dairy or other
• hard cheeses All forms of alcohol
• Fruits – melons or grapes or any fruit
• and vegetables that shown any signs
• of bruising or mould Honey and other natural sweeteners
• Mushrooms Sugar and anything containing sugar
• Peanuts, peanut butter and pistachio All teas and coffees, except herbal teas
• All fruit juices (drink still mineral water instead)

Typical Meals would include (omit foods your are allergic to. East as much as you want)

BREAKFASTS

• 1 Fruit
• Porridge - Oats, maltabella (regular) or
• Mealie (corn) meal. Rice cereal (infant food)
• Rye vita / yeast free bread / rice cakes Avo / cottage cheese / egg / tomato
• Haddock

LUNCH / DINNERS

• Salads eg. potatoes, greens, rice, beans
• (include as many different ingredients as
• possible)
• Meat, fish, chicken (roasted / grilled / steamed)
• Lentils, pulses, legumes-soups, bakes, etc
• All vegetables-steamed and to include
• pumpkin, squash, butternut
• potato-baked, boiled or chips
• brown rice
• salads/stir fries/soups-chicken & veggie
• soup may be frozen & reheated
• yeast free bread/rye vita/rice cakes
• Avo / tomato / cottage cheese / tuna / cold
• chicken

Maintenance Program

After the initial four weeks detox, you can slowly re-introduce foods from the ”Foods to avoid list”, but, please remember to use them in moderation. The foods to continue avoiding, or using with caution are: sugars, white flour, fruit juices, dried fruits, prepared breakfast flakes including muesli, alcohol, vinegar and foods containing yeast.

Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 12:06 PM | Permalink

Alternative Treatment for Clinical Depression

Treating Depression and Anxiety the Natural Way

Prescription Anti-Depressants, Tranquillizers and Sleeping Tablets are regularly prescribed by doctors to treat anything from bereavement to postnatal depression. While there are many responsible and caring doctors out there, there are also many who over prescribe. This may sometimes be due to lack of time, lack of adequate training in emotional problems and mood disorders or sometimes just pure indifference towards the patient's problems! Sad, but unfortunately true!

In my opinion, the above drugs should only be used as a very last resort to treat depression, anxiety, or insomnia which is severe and chronic, i.e. when the person's day to day functioning is badly affected and where the problem is not responsive to any other forms of treatment. Many times, however, prescription drugs are the first line of treatment and this often becomes an obstacle in the patient's road to health and empowerment. In the extreme, it can lead to addiction and more problems than the patient started out with.

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As for prescription sleeping tablets, the majority are addictive if used for longer than two weeks. After a while, more and stronger medication is needed, as the body gets "used" to the drug and "forgets" how to go to sleep by itself. This sets up a cycle of insomnia and dependence which is very difficult to break - and which would have been entirely avoidable if the health practitioner had spent some time listening to the patient and helping him or her to overcome problems, rather than resorting to prescription drugs.

The good news is that there are usually many healthier alternatives which really work well. They are not always the "quick fix', but most are a more permanent and certainly healthier alternative, leaving YOU in control!

Here are a few:

Exercise

I know, I know - you've heard this before and it IS hard to start! But if every client followed this advice, I would go out of business! Regular exercise helps you to feel healthier, increases the production of natural "feel good" chemicals in the body, boosts self-esteem and significantly reduces the symptoms of depression, stress and anxiety. It also helps those struggling to lose weight or fight addictions. The keyword is "regular"! At least half an hour of brisk exercise three times a week. Daily is better if you are trying to beat depression. Walk, swim, jog, dance, do aerobics, whatever - so long as it results in a bit of sweat and an increased heart rate. Believe it or not - if you persevere, you will begin to enjoy it!

Social Support

When you are depressed, you usually isolate yourself and avoid company. Mixing with people is not always what you feel like doing, but loneliness is one of the major causes of depression. Get out there and join the world! You may hate it at first, but do it anyway! It will ultimately help to uplift your spirits and you will not feel so alone. If you don't have a social circle, join one! Volunteer organizations, mothers' groups, churches, sports clubs, hobbies and crafts are all good ideas. Be creative! Try out different alternatives until you find something that you like. Don't give up!

Talk About It

This is the most effective way of relieving depression and anxiety. Share your problems and "externalize" them, rather than bottling them up. You will be amazed at how relieved you feel and how you are able to begin to get things into perspective.

Do Nice Things For Yourself

Nurture and spoil yourself. You deserve it too! So have a bubble bath, buy that special something you've been wanting, play your favorite music and SING, have an aromatherapy massage or relax and soak in your bathtub after adding a few drops of soothing lavender oil to the water. - and do it because YOU ARE SPECIAL!

Learn how to say 'No' to others when it is appropriate and 'Yes' to yourself when you need it. If you tell yourself "I don’t have enough time to do that for myself', ask whether you would make the time if it was someone else's need. You will probably find that, while you have the time to see to the needs of others, you have 'no time' for yourself! Turn this around and see to your needs too. They are just as important! Don't be a martyr and deny yourself and then resent other people for not caring about you!

Diet

No, not the starvation kind! Enjoy your food and eat healthily. Some foods help to fight depression and anxiety. A carbohydrate rich diet helps the body produce serotonin - the 'feelgood' chemical. Special serotonin foods are oats, whole wheat, bananas and other carbohydrate rich foods. Make sure you are having a full supplement of Vitamin B, magnesium, zinc and iron - a deficiency in any of these can lead to depression and anxiety-type symptoms and insomnia

Natural Alternatives

There are many natural alternatives to prescription antidepressants, anxiolytics, and sleeping tablets. Research suggests that St John's Wort is as effective, but has far fewer side effects, than many of the commonly used prescription antidepressants. Passiflora, Melissa, and Lavender are other natural remedies to relieve anxiety and, in sufficient dosage, may also help to induce sleep. To ensure therapeutic dosages and correct manufacturing processes, Feelgood Health has formulated a number of natural remedies to promote emotional and psychological health. PureCalm (adults) and KiddieCalmer (children) are specifically formulated to soothe the symptoms of anxiety and stress, while MindSoothe (adult) and MindSoothe Jr. will assist with anxiety as well as depression. Serenite (adult capsules or drops) and Serenite Jr. help to promote natural sleep. All of these, and other natural remedies, can be ordered online at www.purehealthnutrition.com Consult a health practitioner before changing or stopping prescription medication!

Learn to Relax or Meditate

Relaxation techniques and meditation are easy to learn and are so effective in relieving stress, anxiety, and depression that I wonder why they are not routinely prescribed or even taught as a life skill at school!

Understand Your Symptoms

Why are you feeling depressed? What is bothering you? What needs to change to help you to feel better? Is it something in your present, or are there unresolved issues in your past or in your childhood that you still need to deal with and which are affecting your life and your relationships?

Are your anxiety symptoms realistic or do they subconsciously mask other issues in your life which need dealing with like low self esteem, relationship problems or problems from your childhood?

Symptoms of depression and anxiety are very troublesome, but they are also an 'early warning' signal from your body that something is not right and needs to change. Listen to your body and work on your problems to prevent further ill health.

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Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 11:35 AM | Permalink

While there are many factors that are important in the success or failure of a marriage, the ability to communicate with each other is one that stands out head and shoulders above the rest! I work extensively with couples, both online and offline. After more than 15 years of experience, I can safely say that, no matter what other problems exist, a marriage can stand or fall on the basis of how well the couple can communicate with each other.

I have counseled couples who have everything going for them. They have all the money they need and more. They have lovely children. They have beautiful homes, successful careers, supportive families - everything that they need! Yet because of poor communication skills, their marriage is failing. Conversely, I have counseled couples who are going through very hard times. This could be due to financial difficulties, illness, problems with children or even infidelity. Despite the difficulties that they experience, couples who can communicate clearly with each other have a much better chance of overcoming problems and staying together.

Poor communication causes conflict, misunderstanding, hurt and resentment. Effective communication can keep marriages together in even the most difficult of times. If I had to identify the most important element of a successful marriage, it would be the couple's ability to communicate with each other.

Communication is a very complex thing. If it were simple, I suppose it would be much easier to get it right! In order to do the subject full justice, one would need to go into much more depth than is possible in the space of one E-booklet. However, over the years, I have identified certain communication styles or problems which cause difficulties in relationships. What I will do in this E-booklet, is to talk about some of the most important mistakes that couples make and also look at some strategies to develop healthier communication patterns in a marriage. As I go through them, I am sure that you will recognize yourself in many of the examples that I use. Whether you are a young couple who wants to improve on a good relationship, or a couple in crisis who need some help, this E-booklet will give you some guidelines to work on to improve your communication skills.

Before I continue, let us first establish that it is impossible NOT to communicate. Even when two people are refusing to talk to each other, they are communicating something. Communication consists of words, silences, body language and other observable behavior - not words alone.

Having established that, let us look at 10 steps one can take to develop healthier communication patterns in your relationship.

Why have I begun with such a simple rule? Surely everybody knows this? Well, sure they do - but do they practice it? In my experience the answer is No. The majority of people who consult me with marriage problems do not make regular time to be together and just talk. Life is busy. Children, careers, chores, recreation, friends and even TV often take precedence over the couple's time together. When they do 'go out', it is probably to a movie or to friends where it is impossible to talk properly with each other. They are forever 'meaning' to spend time together and never get around to it. Soon they lose the ability to communicate with each other and may even find it difficult to spend time in each other's company. Look around you in a restaurant. Some people say that you can identify the people who have been married for more than five years by the fact that they neither look at nor talk to each other. This may be a generalization, but it is often not far from the truth.

Without sufficient time together, it is not possible to learn to communicate well with each other. I have had couples who have consulted me with major problems, which have improved with the simple addition of more quality time together. It is an extremely important prerequisite for healthy communication! Don't just agree to this in principle - practice it as well! Practice it NOW and not some time in the future when it is more 'convenient'.

Because time is difficult to come by, you should make a deliberate effort to make time for each other. The best way to do this is to set aside a regular time at least once a week, or to make a definite day which is 'your' day or evening as a couple. You do not need to go out or spend money - you can stay at home and spend time together as well. Many people want to do this, but never seem to get it right. This brings me to my second step.

2. Priorities your time together

As I said above, it is not enough to agree in principle. That is why regular quality time happens so infrequently between couples. Just like anything else, you have to prioritize time together. You have to see it as more important than the other things that take up your time or else it will not happen - especially if you have a busy schedule.

Why do most people get up every morning and go to work? Not because they love it, but because they have a routine of doing so, usually from Monday to Friday and at specified times. They are required to put in a certain amount of work and so they do. What would happen to the majority of us if our employers said that we could come to work 'when we had the time' and were prepared to pay us and promote us whether or not we did much work? How much time would we allocate to our work? What would we achieve?

Remember the old friend that you bumped into at the supermarket? The one who said that you should get together 'some time soon'? Have you heard from her? The chances are that you have not. What about the one who invited you for tea on Saturday afternoon at 3 pm? Now that would probably be an important date that you would want to keep!

If you expect the rewards of a good relationship, you MUST make regular time to spend together by prioritizing this as important in your life and by officially blocking off the time. If someone asks you around on a Friday night - and that is the night you usually spend with your partner, say 'I am busy that night'. Make your time together the most important thing you do and it will certainly pay off! I cannot over-stress the importance of regular time together. This is so important that I have even advised couples to discontinue counseling unless they are prepared to make time together.

I am often amazed at people who are surprised that they get on better with their friends than their partners without realizing that one of the reasons is that they spend more quality time with their friends!

Many couples who have become estranged due to lack of time together, may find that when they do decide to work on it, they either end up arguing or they cannot find two words to say to each other. They then give it up as a 'bad job'. Many come to their next therapy session and tell me 'It didn't work'.

My answer is 'That is fine. You did it - now keep doing it!' The fact is that you cannot expect to suddenly start communicating by magic! If you haven't been out together for awhile, your expectations of the evening may be high and this could cause stress - which results in an argument. Small talk is easier between regular strangers than between couples. After all, you know most of the details of each other's histories (career, hobbies, children, etc) - so you cannot simply chatter away as you would with a stranger.

If your first attempt does not work out, congratulate each other on spending the evening together and decide a date for the next time. Spend time together regardless of how difficult the time is - so long as you are both committed to keep on trying, that is the most important thing.

3. Never use intimidating tactics

Do not bully your partner. Shouting, swearing, threatening or banging of doors is abusive behavior. So is throwing objects, breaking things in the environment and, of course, actual violence against the person's body. This kind of behavior is not acceptable under any circumstances whatsoever. Any behavior which would be defined as either rude, abusive or criminal if it were aimed at your neighbor, should be seen in an even worse light when it is aimed at your partner. Even if you are very angry and you have good reason to be so, violence or verbal abuse is unacceptable. SAY "I am so angry I don't know how to express it". DON'T smash your fist into the table to communicate your anger.

4. Never assume you understand

Make this a rule and you will avoid lots of problems and misunderstandings. I have sat in sessions with couples who have started a fight before my eyes because one of them misunderstood the other. Very often couples even argue about the very same thing! If you find that this happens to you a lot, try to make it a rule to double check with each other. If your partner says "I will see you at the entrance to the mall at 3pm', confirm that you have understood her. Say 'Three o'clock at the FRONT entrance, right?'

Sometimes we interpret things or communicate things incorrectly and then it is even more important to double check that you understand, before becoming emotional and attaching your own meaning to something. If your partner says "Sometimes I long for the times when I was single" it is very easy to translate this into "I wish I had never married you", especially when you are feeling insecure. Once again, don't assume - rather double check. Say "Do you mean that you wish that you had never married me?" or just "What do you mean by that?" You will find that you avoid many arguments and misunderstandings if you do not always assume that you understand and confirm that you have heard and interpreted your partner correctly.

5. Have your arguments one at a time!

Don't store up your resentments, hurts and anger until they become too much to handle and then blast them all out in one go when the straw hits the proverbial camel's back! You will appear unreasonable and your partner will probably behave very defensively. If there is something that is bothering you, take responsibility for your feelings and deal with it! Speak to your partner and say how you feel, without accusing him. Say "I feel hurt when you criticize me in public. I don't want you to do it anymore." Don't say "You always pick on me. I know that you think I am stupid!" Above all, don't say nothing and allow your feelings to build up until you explode and then drag out all the past hurts and complaints while you are about it! Deal with things one at a time and as soon as possible.

6. Do not 'piggy back' your arguments.

How often have you told your partner "I wish you would pick up your socks", only to be told "Well, what about you - you always leave the kitchen in a mess and expect me to clean it". This is a very destructive way of arguing and is often just a knee jerk reaction designed to protect and focus attention away from oneself. Make a point of not responding to this poor communication strategy and never to be guilty of it yourself. If you wait for your partner to speak to you about something that bothers him and then jump on him with a complaint of your own, you will firstly discourage him from speaking to you about problems and secondly, you will be sure to cause an argument in which no one 'wins' and in which the issue at hand is never resolved.

When something bothers you, whether it is big or small, speak calmly to your partner about it. Do not wait for her to bring up a related issue and then 'jump on the bandwagon'. If your partner speaks about something on her mind, thank her for telling you about how she feels and try and understand her point of view and improve the way that you handle things. If she says "I wish you wouldn't leave your socks all over the place", say "Thanks for telling me that it bugs you. I will try to remember to put them in the laundry basket in future." Is that so difficult? Don't add your own 'complaint' to the list. Take responsibility for voicing your own concerns when they arise, rather than 'piggy backing' them onto a concern of your partner's.

If you find your partner doing this, say "That is a different issue. You are welcome to talk to me about it when it arises again. For now, can we deal with what I have said?"

7. Work towards a 'Win Win' rather than a "Win Lose' situation.

If you and your partner differ on a fundamental or even a minor issue, it rarely works to argue about it until somebody 'loses'. In a situation like this there are no clear victors. Rather try to work towards a compromise which suits both of you.

For example, if one of you wants to go and see an action movie and the other wants to see a love story, don't fight until one of you 'gives in'. Try and find a solution together in which you both 'win'. This may be solved by agreeing that one can choose the movie this week, while the other chooses next week or it may be some other solution (like flipping a coin) that works for both of you. The same solution could be applied to more difficult issues, like differences in religion.

8. Choose your time carefully when you need to talk about difficult things

Try not to deal with big issues when you feel emotional or when you are tired.

For example, when your husband comes home at three o' clock in the morning, it is very difficult not to become upset and start shouting at him. This can only result in a huge argument where both of you say things which you later regret. Rather wait until the morning and then speak to him about how you feel. Ask him to explain himself and if you are not happy with his explanation, tell him so. Clearly define your limits in the situation as well as what you are and are not prepared to accept. Then let it go and move on. If he continues to do the same thing and disregards your feelings, then you have to decide what you are going to do about this. Are you prepared to accept it? Can you continue in the marriage if he refuses to change? Once you have made your decision, communicate it to him and take the necessary action.

Timing is always important - even for seemingly minor things. Think of the wife who begins confronting and questioning her husband the moment he opens the door. "Did you get the car washed?" "Why are you so late", "Just wait until I tell you what the kids got up to today" or even "The dog ate your favorite T-shirt". Rather spend some time greeting your partner and touching base in a warm and friendly way. Give him or her some space to adjust to being at home again. Later on you can communicate 'bad news', bring up the issues that have been bugging you or ask the questions that you need to ask. Even half an hour to 'chill out' can make all the difference.

9. Don't use 'stonewalling', 'cold war' or 'passive aggressive' tactics to try and communicate your displeasure

We are all guilty of this sometimes and these can be very destructive communication patterns.

If your partner does something that you don't like, you may 'freeze up' and refuse to talk to or look at him for days. I have counseled couples who have been in this mode for months or even years. Learn to speak about your feelings and take responsibility for working through them with your partner. Remember, silences can become longer and longer each time until you both loose touch with each other permanently. This is very difficult to reverse after it has reached a certain point.

Don't be 'passive aggressive'. This is a very common and unhealthy way of communicating where the person deliberately and stubbornly refuses to co-operate as a way of communicating anger or resentment. A very simple example is the three-year-old child who works as slowly as possible to the bathroom because she does not want to go and have a bath. An 'adult' version of this would be a partner who withholds money from the budget because she is angry or who runs up the credit card as a way of 'punishing' her partner. Some people withhold sex, money or affection in order to communicate their angry or resentful feelings. Passive aggressive behavior is infuriating and childish! Take responsibility for your feelings and speak about them. Set clear limits and make your own decisions about how to respond in a mature way to your partner's behavior.

10. Be aware of repeating unhealthy communication patterns that you have learnt
from your parents

Many people are shocked to realize how their marriages resemble the marriages of their parents. It is very true that we learn how to be husbands or a wives by watching the way our parents treat each other. This then becomes part of our subconscious approach to our partners when we are adults - even when we don't believe in it intellectually. Examine the way that you communicate with your partner. Do you bully? Do you nag? Do you submit too easily? Do you behave like your mother or your father? Be brutally honest with yourself. If you find that you have been repeating patterns of communication that your parents used, make a conscious decision to change. At first it will be difficult, but if you persevere it will become easier.

11. OK - I know I said Ten Steps, but here is one more for luck!

Try and remember to emphasize the positive more than the negative. It is easy to fall into the trap of focusing on negative things and forgetting to communicate positive feelings to your partner. Remember to praise and encourage each other and to regularly tell your partner what you like about him or her. We all need to feel admired and appreciated and when you communicate positive things to your partner, you create warm and loving feelings between the two of you. So tell your wife that she looks pretty in the red dress or tell your husband how handsome he looks with his new haircut. Speak about the things that you admire about each other as often as possible - it will make a big difference to how you feel towards each other!

Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 11:28 AM | Permalink

Although there is some controversy regarding the diagnosis of ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) as a psychiatric disorder, most children who are 'diagnosed' with ADHD share similar features. What I am going to do in this eBooklet is to briefly discuss those features and their possible causes - and explore various methods of helping your child (and yourself!) to avoid pitfalls and to allow potential to be maximized.

General characteristics of children with ADHD

So first - what are the features that many ADHD children share? Here I am going to speak moreabout my observations of ADHD, rather than what the textbooks say. Every parent will identify with this! Over the years, I have seen many children with ADHD type problems in my practice and, quite frankly, the parents and the children have often taught me more than the textbooks have! Obviously, not all children show exactly the same symptoms and these may or may not apply to your child.

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The textbooks distinguish between ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder) and ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder). So one of the most common features of children with ADHD is therefore hyperactivity. They don't stop! They may have difficulty sitting still in class (or anywhere!) and even struggle to lie still for long enough to fall asleep at night.

They also struggle to pay attention. This is usually due to a combination of two things - short attention span and high levels of distractibility. Most of us have the ability to focus on something we are doing and to effectively 'shut out' sounds and other stimuli that are not important to the task at hand. ADHD children will try to focus, but are unable to minimize other distractions like traffic outside, dogs barking, a bird cheeping, etc. They also become distracted by their own thoughts! The only thing some children are able to focus on is TV or perhaps a computer game, due to the hypnotic nature of these activities.

Other features are difficulty in planning activities (always intending to do something but never managing to get round to it or complete it), losing or misplacing possessions, forgetting things, impulsiveness, recklessness and invading the personal space of other children and even adults. Because they are often in trouble, ADHD children may also develop poor self-esteem and can also become angry and frustrated very easily. They often appear to be immature for their ages and may learn to lie and deceive to try and avoid trouble. Sometimes there are associated learning problems like poor handwriting, reading and calculation problems and difficulty distinguishing left from right. While most children will experience some of these symptoms at times, in the ADHD child they may be frequent and severe.

The first thing to do if you suspect or are told that your child has ADHD is to have him assessed. Many well-meaning doctors simply prescribe very strong drugs like Ritalin without having the child assessed by a psychologist to determine what the problem really is. Some causes of ADHD type symptoms are food intolerance, hypoglycemia (low blood sugar), allergies, low muscle tone, perceptual difficulties, nutritional problems, candida, hyperthyroidism, Tourettes Disorder, brain dysfunction, family and emotional problems, poor discipline, depressionand other conditions. Each of these problems would require different treatment and some may even be exacerbated by Ritalin. So assess before prescribing is the golden rule! If your child has already been assessed and diagnosed and is taking prescription medication, be aware that there ARE alternatives!

Now that we have covered some of the features and possible causes of ADHD type symptoms, let's have a look athow to manage your child in ways that will be kind, firm and effective. If you are very consistent with some of these suggestions and interventions, you may even find that your child's 'symptoms' disappear or become much less severe (as I see in almost 90% of the children that I treat if parents are committed to the process!)

The first thing to look at is your child's diet. While some professionals dismiss this as nonsense, I have see some spectacular changes in children once certain foods have been removed from their diets. Not all children respond, but there are definitely some children who do - and quite dramatically! Things to avoid are soda pops (especially cola drinks), anything with caffeine (again cola drinks, coffee, Ceylon tea and chocolate), food with high sugar content as well as anything containing tartrazine (an artificial food coloring) or artificial preservatives. One must make allowances for the occasional treat and freedom to enjoy a birthday party for example, but educate your child and be firm about what he may and may not eat, especially on school days.

Secondly, limit the hours spent watching television and playing computer games (Here the family will have to be disciplined as well) I advise no television on school nights and perhaps two hours in total during the weekend. No television before school. Television and computer games in excess affect the child's ability to concentrate at school and can also cause reading problems in sensitive children.

Thirdly, maintain as much routine and consistency in your child's life as possible. ADHD children respond very well to routine and ritual as it helps them to use their limited concentration abilities on other things and also helps them to feel safer. If your child is little, have a definite bedtime and stick to it. Have a routine at night (dinner, shower, story, lights out) and keep it the same every night. Try to avoid major or frequent changes if possible. Ensure that family relationships are stable. All children need this, but ADHD children find conflict and chaos in the family even more difficult to handle and often show this by becoming out of control and disobedient.

Be very consistent in your discipline. If you are a two-parent family, try and follow through and keep all rules the same and do not allow inconsistency. What applies to today must apply to tomorrow. Don't be tempted to allow your child to 'get away' with something because YOU are tired, for example!

While on the subject of discipline, try not to use physical punishment likehitting your child and try hard not to shout and yell. Rather work out a system of 'points' or rewards along with a system of 'consequences' and apply it very firmly. It is very easy to become frustrated with ADHD children and they are often punished and yelled at. Teachers and parents tend to say hurtful things like 'YOU NEVER listen!' or 'What's WRONG with you?!' and all of these things become part of the child's self concept, causing further behavioral and emotional problems.

Younger children may have to be taught social skills more carefully than the average child. Most children learn about social cues and messages almost automatically. Children who are impulsive or have difficulty paying attention often misinterpret social cues. They may snatch toys, push in front of other children or interfere with their games. They may be labeled selfish or called bullies. Try and be patient and explain to them what is the right thing to do, rather than yelling at them. Say "Johnny was mad at you because he was busy with a puzzle and then you tried to do it for him. Try and find one to do by yourself" or "People sometimes feel uncomfortable if we stand very close to them. We each have our own space that we like to keep. Pretend that you have a hula hoop around you and don't get closer than the hula hoop space!"

This may seem simple, but think about it carefully! GET YOUR CHILD'S ATTENTION BEFORE YOU GIVE AN INSTRUCTION! Do not communicate with your child from one room to another, for example. Some children may cope with this, but it is difficult for ADHD children to focus on what you are saying. Call your child. Stand in front of her. Look in her eyes and say her name -say "Jane, look at Mom. I want you to go and take a shower, OK?" Keep eye contact all the way through the instruction. Make sure your child replies to you and says "Yes, Mom" before she runs off. If she fails to carry out the instruction, call her back and get eye contact again. Kindly but firmly say "What did I just ask you to do?" Repeat your instruction if necessary.

Tell your child WHEN you want something done. If you say "I want you to take a shower" or "Go and do your chores" your child will readily agree - and then not do anything! You must always try to give some warning to get your child used to the idea first - "In five minute sit will be time for your shower, OK" (Remember to do this with eye contact) Then when the time comes, say "I want you to take your shower now."

Give ONE instruction at a time! Most parents are guilty of not doing this at the best of times! If your child struggles to pay attention and remember things it makes sense to say one thing at a time. So don't say "I want you go to your room, get undressed, put your clothes in the laundry, take a shower and then do your homework. Oh - and don't forget to feed the dog!" The chances are good that your child will follow the first instruction ("Go to your room") and then get lost in some other activity!

Help an older child to learn to use check lists and other prompts to assist his memory. (e.g. "Before leaving school, I must have three things - school bag, lunch box and sweaters." "When I get home, I must tick off my chores on the list I have pinned up in my room") Devise a reward system should the lists work for a whole week.

Speak often to your child's teachers. Tell them what works for you and hear what works for them. Communicate with the teachers on a regular basis so that you know what is happening in your child's life outside the home and don't only find things out when they are too far advanced.

While on the subject of school, ADHD children tend to function better in smaller classes (less distraction) with teachers who are kind, consistent, patient, butvery firm and who communicate clearly! It is usually better for them to sit in front of the class and in a place which has the least distractions.

Play games that promote concentration, listening skills and memory

A good one is the alphabet game. It can bef played by two or more people.The first person thinks of an animal name that begins with 'A'. (e.g. Antelope). The next person repeats this and adds one with 'B', (e.g. bear). So she says 'Antelope, Bear'. The next person then thinks of an animal beginning with the letter 'C' (e.g. Cow) and says 'Antelope, Bear, Cow'. Continue until the whole alphabet is used up. It can be quite fun and is excellent for promoting listening skills, memoryand concentration.

You can also play the Shopping List game. Again using the alphabet, each person thinks of an item of shopping beginning with the relevant letter and says "I went to the store and bought some........." Turn by turn the list is repeated and a new item added on each time. The last round would look something like this "I went to the store and bought some apples, butter, cabbage, donuts, eggs, fish, grapes, ham, ice pops, jelly, kleenex, lettuce, mayo, nectarines, onions, plums, quinces, rice, sausage, tomatoes, umbrellas, vitamins, water, xerox paper, yams and zucchini!

For visual memory and concentration, ask your children to cut out pictures of five or more items and paste them on a page. Each child gets a turn to show her picture to the group for 10 seconds and then turn it face down. Every child then writes down the items that he can remember. See who can remember all the items! The older the children, the more items should be used.

Games like 'Simon Says' and 'Statues' are familiar to all of us from our childhood and also help to promote listening skills. There are many inexpensive card games which one can buy which help to develop memory and concentration skills. Pay a visit to your local toy shop and see what you can find.

Consider alternatives to strong prescription drugs and inform yourself about the side effects in the long and the short term (see the reading list below). Some children respond very well to homeopathic remedies for ADHD. I have formulated a homeopathic remedy called 'BrightSpark' which I have used for years in my practice and which has helped many children, especially if the above guidelines are also followed. For more information on 'BrightSpark' and other remedies, visit http://www.purehealthnutrition.com/native-remedies-c-382.html

BrightSpark - Child ADD+ADHD Remedy For children under 12, treats and relieves symptoms of ADD and ADHD. Helps children focus, pay attention, relax, and be less impulsive. No addiction, drowsiness or other side effects. $29.95 + S/H

Posted by Pure Health Nutrition at 08:05 PM | Permalink

Proven Natural Treatment of Anxiety and Irritability - Signs of a Nervous Breakdown

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1. Diagnosis of Anxiety Disorders

When anxiety becomes so chronic or intense that it affects the person's day to day functioning and hampers performance, we will usually diagnose an Anxiety Disorder. Some people have what is called a Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). This means that their anxiety does not have a specific focus like, for example, a phobia, but is mere 'free floating' and forms part of their everyday functioning and response to life. Symptoms of GAD include motor tension (edginess, jumpiness, trembling, restlessness, twitching, muscle aches, easily startled, furrowed brow, inability to relax), autonomic activity (sweating, heart palpitations, dry mouth, dizziness, tingling in hands and feet, upset stomach, shortness of breath, frequent urination), apprehensive expectation (anxiety, fear, worry, and persistent thoughts of potential misfortune), vigilance and scanning (constantly on the alert for danger, failure or disaster, resulting in difficulties in concentration, irritability, impotence and insomnia). GAD is diagnosed if these symptoms have been present continuously for more than one month.

Other sufferers of anxiety are diagnosed with Panic Disorder, Phobic Disorders, or Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

A Panic Disorder will be diagnosed if there are at least three panic attacks within a three-week period in reaction to situations that are not life threatening and which are not associated with physical exertion. Symptoms include shortness of breath or choking sensations, heart palpitations, chest pain, dizziness or faintness, tingling in hands or feet, hot and cold flashes, sweating, trembling, fear of dying or heart attack, and a feeling of unreality or danger.

Phobic Disorders include a persistent fear and compelling desire to avoid an object or situation to the extent that the person's life, functioning, and relationships are significantly impaired. Examples of phobic events include Social Phobia (fear of embarrassment in social situations) and Agoraphobia (fear of public places), fear of heights, flying, etc. Phobic objects may include anything from animals and insects to numbers or colors.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) may take the form of excessive and intrusive obsessive thoughts, images or impulses that are almost impossible to ignore or stop, even if the individual understands that they are senseless or unfounded. The disorder may also include repetitive and often purposeless behaviors that are often performed according to certain rules and which are sometimes believed to prevent or produce some future situation or event. The person does not find the activity pleasurable but does experience a sense of relief from tension when performing it. The obsessive thoughts, behaviors or impulses usually interfere significantly with functioning.

2. Causes of Anxiety Disorders

There are many different theories about the causes of anxiety disorders. Some theories say that they are genetic and are purely chemical in nature. There is some evidence for this, as anxiety disorders very often tend to run in families, even when children have been adopted at birth and never meet their biological parents. Other theorists say that extreme anxiety is learnt from an overly anxious parent or that it originates from some trauma during early childhood or from overly punitive parenting. It is very likely that there is usually a combination of these potential causes and each case must be viewed as a unique one and well investigated before any pronouncements are made about the causes.

3. Differential Diagnosis

When we speak about differential diagnosis, we speak about ruling out the possibility that the anxiety symptoms may be caused by something other than an Anxiety Disorder. Anybody who experiences clusters of symptoms similar to those discussed above should always have a thorough medical examination. Symptoms similar to those above may be attributable to thyroid problems, heart problems (particularly mitral valve), reactions to certain prescription or recreational drugs, and even ear infections or allergies. If these are ruled out, the likelihood is that the person is suffering from an anxiety disorder. It makes little sense to keep treating someone for anxiety when that is not the real problem and it is surprising how often that actually happens!

4. Treatment

Differenttherapiststreat anxiety in different ways and this depends largely on their particular training, experience, and outlook. Also some clients respond better to one form of treatment than others and it is important for the therapist to do a thorough assessment and get to know his client before deciding on treatment.

Some therapists treat their clients with prescription drugs like anxiolytics, beta blockers, or even antidepressants. This means that they are treating the symptoms of the anxiety. Anxiety symptoms or OCD can often be successfully controlled by the careful use of prescription drugs. Unfortunately many of them can be addictive or produce side effects and the person often builds up a tolerance to them, needing to take more and more to achieve a similar effect. Another criticism is that no attention is paid to the causes of the anxiety or to helping the person learn ways of controlling or managing the anxiety without drugs.

Many therapists use techniques like progressive relaxation or meditation to help the client learn how to access his own calming response (everybody has one!) and to lower anxiety levels to more comfortable states. This is often combined with psychotherapy to help improve self-esteem and understand the causes of the anxiety, cognitive therapy to 'reprogram' the negative thoughts underlying the anxiety, or desensitization aimed at eliminating phobias.

There are also many natural products which help and may be used alone or in combination with therapy. It is usually best to speak to your pharmacist, health store owner, or health care professional to find out what is best for you and how to take it, but some common herbs are Passiflora, Pasque Flower, St John's Wort, Melissa, Chamomile and Kava Kava.

It is important to note that most anxiety disorders respond well to treatment and I would encourage anyone who suffers from anxiety to go for help. It can make all the difference to your life!

5. Self Help

There are many things thatwill help with anxiety.

If you are experiencing stress at work, in your relationships or anywhere else, look and see what changes need to be made. Get help if you feel you are unable to do this yourself.

Regular exercise is one of the most beneficial things one can do and has been shown to have a significant effect on lowering anxiety symptoms and improving well being. At least 45 minutes 3 - 5 times a week will make all the difference!

Make sure that you eat regularly to avoid fluctuations in blood sugar level and have at least 7 to 8 hours of sleep a night! Sleep deprivation can cause symptoms of anxiety.

Avoid stimulants like coffee, tea (except herbal teas), sugary foods, chocolate or carbonated drinks, particularly the cola variety. People who suffer from anxiety, who are at greater risk for dependence, should never take alcohol and most recreational drugs. These substances can also worsen the anxiety symptoms.

Include oats, bananas, avocado pears, whole-wheat pasta, bread and brown rice in your diet.

Set aside at least15 minutes twice a day to sit in a quiet spot, close your eyes and practice deep breathing. Listen to soothing music or a relaxation tape or CD.

If there is something specific that is causing anxiety (like shyness or fear of animals) see if you can't gradually become accustomed to it, little by little. This will also improve your confidence and self esteem.

Talk to people about how you feel! Try and socialize, start a hobby, take up a sport or develop new interests! Perhaps think about offering your services as a volunteer to help others. Anything which takes your mind off yourself and keeps you interested will help!

6. Conclusion

As we have discussed, anxiety can take many different forms and can be treated in many different ways. There are also many things which one can do oneself to control or significantly reduce the symptoms of anxiety. Most of these take some work and persistence, but then so does an Anxiety Disorder! Believe in yourself and spend time getting to know what works for you and then persevere with it. You will be surprised how much you can help yourself.

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